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Develon’s DX235RTF7 Excavator: So Good at Tunneling, Even the Moles Are Updating Their Resumes (RIP Acorn Economy)


Devlon

The DX235RTF-7 is a beast.
Tunneling jobs often mean dragging heavy machinery into places that even a mountain goat would call “a bit tight.” Luckily, the DX235RTF-7 was designed with this struggle in mind—making it easy to lift, maneuver, and squeeze into spaces that would give a contortionist second thoughts.

In a move that has sent shockwaves through both the construction industry and the underground animal kingdom, Develon has unveiled the DX235RTF-7 tunnelling excavator—a machine so advanced, so precise, and so terrifyingly efficient that it’s basically a metal badger on steroids.


But not everyone is thrilled. A coalition of 12 extremely angry animals—including badgers, mole rats, prairie dogs, and one deeply confused city pigeon named Kevin—have declared war on the excavator. Their demands? An immediate halt to what they’re calling “unnatural digging,” reparations in the form of premium topsoil, and the immediate cancellation of “whatever unholy Transformers sequel this thing auditioned for.”


DX235RTF-7: The Machine That Can Out-Yoga a Prairie Dog

Built on the chassis of the DX235LCR-7 reduced-radius excavator, Develon’s latest mechanical marvel comes with a DL06V Stage V engine (141kW of raw, unapologetic burrowing power) and a tilting boom that can pivot 45° in two directions.


That last feature has proven especially controversial.


a squirrel.
Squirrel advocate.

“Our tunnels have been handcrafted for generations with nothing but teeth, claws, and a deeply ingrained fear of hawks,”** hissed Brenda, badger spokesperson for the newly formed Underground Workers United (UWU).** “And now this machine waltzes in with its ‘hydraulic tilting boom’ like some kind of metal yoga instructor? We can’t compete with that flexibility! Have you ever seen a gopher stretch? It’s pathetic.”


Jan Breburda, Develon’s Special Applications Product Manager, remained unmoved. “The DX235RTF-7 is a game-changer,” he said, casually leaning against the excavator like a guy in a cologne commercial. “It’s like sending a Terminator to a knitting circle—efficient, relentless, and weirdly graceful.”


The Furry Resistance (And One Pigeon’s Personal Vendetta)

The UWU (yes, that’s really their acronym) has released a list of demands to combat what they see as “tunneling gentrification”:

✅ A 500-meter no-dig zone around all acorn stockpiles.

✅ Mandatory tea breaks for the DX235RTF-7, because “it’s clearly overworking,” argued a mole rat in a tiny vest.

✅ Kevin the pigeon’s immediate removal from the coalition. “Why am I even here?!” he squawked during a press conference, before immediately forgetting and pecking at the microphone.


The animals also take issue with the machine’s advanced LED lighting system and AVM cameras. “HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO UNION-BUST IN THE DARK NOW?!” Brenda demanded. “It’s unfair!”


The Dig-Off: Kevin vs. The Machine

Tensions reached a breaking point when Kevin the pigeon personally challenged the DX235RTF-7 to a dig-off.


“I don’t even dig,” he admitted, adjusting a pair of aviator sunglasses he absolutely did not need. “But if some machine thinks it’s better than nature’s original construction workers, I’ll show it what real grit looks like.”


The match was set.


ROUND 1: SPEED – The excavator dug through solid rock in minutes. Kevin, after aggressively pecking the ground for 10 seconds, declared himself the winner and flew off to eat a discarded French fry.


ROUND 2: STYLE – The DX235RTF-7’s tilting boom executed a flawless 45° maneuver. Kevin face-planted into the dirt and called it ‘performance art.’


ROUND 3: TEAMWORK – The machine’s advanced hydraulic system operated seamlessly. Kevin tried to recruit a team of prairie dogs for moral support. They ignored him.


After three humiliating rounds, Kevin stormed off, muttering, “This thing’s clearly juicing.”


Develon’s Response: “Skill Issue”

Asked about the resistance, Breburda shrugged, oozing main-character energy.

“Look, the DX235RTF-7 isn’t the enemy. It’s just… evolved. Maybe these animals should dig smarter, not harder?” He then demonstrated the excavator’s centralized greasing points with the delicate precision of a Michelin-star chef plating a meal.


Meanwhile, a group of highly motivated squirrels attempted to disable the machine with a well-placed walnut barrage. They failed spectacularly.


Final Verdict: Nature vs. The Future

Let’s be real: The DX235RTF-7 isn’t just a machine—it’s a message. A message that says, “Move over, nature; there’s a new burrower in town.”

And while the UWU threatens an all-out strike (or at least a strongly worded letter to Mother Nature), Develon’s excavator is already lining up gigs in subway tunnels, sewer systems, and anywhere else small mammals fear to tread.


As for Kevin? He was last seen pecking furiously at the excavator’s camera lenses, muttering, “These taste like oppression.” 🚜🐦💥


Develon: Because sometimes, the future looks like a giant metal badger. A really, really efficient one.


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